Twenty-four
I'm beginning to recognise who I am in the mirror
No longer faded
No longer jaded
Not perfect
Not unforgettable
An evolving moving image
Flickering as I
Balance
what I want
with what I can have
Twenty four
Nearing the mid mid-twenties
Alone, single, smart, successful --
Or so I'm told.
I'm happy.
The words taste strange on my tongue.
Is this happiness?
The ability to find loneliness
In the middle of a pushing crowd of emotion
To taste it's bittersweetness
Feel its goosebump inducing chill
And embrace it in the dark night
The night:
When everything looms larger
As though under a towering magnifying glass;
Wraps me in a cold blanket hug
It still scares me
It still isolates me
It still scatters my thoughts in a million directions
Grains of rice spooling through my fingers
Seemingly multiplying in the dark
The day:
A harsh bright light
Laughing at the insecurities the night cultivates
A splash of cold water for the sleepy
A cup of coffee for the hungover
Twenty four
I balance the night and the day
Precariously
Finding my footing
Clumsy landings and muddled form
A half-formed person
Flickering image.